I avoided a social gathering the other day because I could not bear to be in a group and NOT discuss what was going on in our country. It was the evening before the No Kings protest and military parade in DC. This is a casual neighborhood group and I am not 100% certain of everyone’s political leanings. It probably would have been ok if I had brought up the protests considering I live in Eastern Massachusetts but I didn’t feel like dealing with it.

A friend from France asked me what others in the US think about the political situation right now and I told him I only knew what people were writing and saying online. Don’t you discuss it with your friends, he asked? No, I don’t. No one does. Politics is so polarized in the US that no one discusses it anymore, unless it’s fighting with strangers on the internet.

Even among liberal friends I have gotten shot down for bringing up the election. I was told that I was preaching to the choir and that we were all on the same page when I expressed my worries a few days before the inauguration. I thought it was sad that we cannot discuss these things anymore.

I get it, talking about politics and current events makes me uncomfortable too. I don’t have all the facts at my fingertips like a Wikipedia entry. I can’t come up with the wittiest comment or innuendo. But mostly I get emotional. I can’t stay calm when talking about injustice or decisions that may hurt a lot of people. I feel the heat rising to my face, my skin turning red and my voice getting shaky. Maybe a lot of people feel that way?

Or maybe we live in a prudish Puritan culture where it is impolite or distasteful to discuss “difficult” matters in a social setting. Not sure where we are supposed to discuss them then if the Thanksgiving table is off limits, the office is off limits and beers around a bonfire are off limits too. Then where does that leave? I guess that is what social media is for? I am being facetious.

I went to the No Kings protest with a friend that I know is also politically outspoken. I told her about skipping the night before and she admitted that she too had been avoiding certain social situations. We agreed it was so nice to be in community with like minded people at the protest but this country is in trouble if we can’t talk about these issues. Who am I kidding? We are already in big trouble and maybe this inability to discuss our differences has contributed to it.

I’d love to hear what you think in the comments!